Dan+Melissa engaged!

“No… wait. that’s not his truck.”

-all: “WHAT!?”

“Where is he?”

“oh, wait. text message: he’s just getting off the freeway.”

“you kidding me!?”

It’s 11:00pm on a friday night and I am crouched behind a corregated shipping container somewhere in Cloverdale, at the top of a hill; waiting for Dan and his soon-to-be fiance to arrive. It’s cold. It’s raining. I am covered in mud. My camera equipment is also wet, and covered in mud. I am part of the “the plan”

The Plan:
Set up pavilion in field.
Have 2 chairs in pavilion. Light many candles in and around the pavilion area
Have chairs in pavilion face large hill.
Rent Generator, Purchase copious amounts of Christmas lights. 30 strands?
spell out in 30ft block letters with Christmas lights: “Marry Me?”
When Dan, with signal given with flashlight, is about to ask the question: start generator and wow her with massive glowing “Marry Me?” text.
Take some pictures. (my part of the plan)

I have been out here for 20mins and I’m shivering, my shoes are wet, my nice pants are ALL muddy…
Nick and Mike have been out here since 7pm. setting up the lights. I’m such a you-know-what.

Nick and Mike discovered, in trying to set up the lights, that the effects of rain mixed with a steep incline equals an incredibly slick hill. They spent the better part of 3 hours stringing christmas lights across, (which i can testify to) probably the slipperiest hill in existance. By the time I arrived they were covered in mud. Head to toe. They even brought a toboggan, and it worked great. 

The Pavilion was a snap. (it’s actually the youth church creationfest tent) Simon had come by earlier and helped Nick set it up. What a guy. what character.

\\fast forward.

“thats Dan’s truck! its them! hide!”

 I can’t see anything. It’s dark out, I don’t have my glasses. 

“….they are sitting in the chairs….he’s talking to her…..they are hugging…..talking some more….”

I still can’t see anything from the top of the hill. 

“thats the signal! he’s shining the flashlight!”

Nick scambles out from our hiding place to start the generator. 

“God, please make this generator start. or this is going to really. really. suck.”

RoooooaaaaR! Generator On.

NOW i can see.

“he’s on one knee! he’s propsing!….. they are hugging now…….still hugging…..i think thats a yes……still hugging…..Is that a yes….?”

it was a yes. 

- Man this is what it is all about. Who gives up 5 hours of their time on a Friday night to set up an elaborate over-the-top scheme to help someone propose? After rain, mud and twisted knees we are all smiles. This was worth it. For a friend and brother this small task is nothing. everyone has gladly made themselves miserable just so someone can have a special moment. Which of your friends would do this for you? Which of your friends would you do this for? I hope the list is long; for both questions. 
I know this guy that talks a lot about being “others interested” -about putting your needs second to everyone else. About sacrificing for others. Maybe this is what it looks like. Maybe. 

Congrats to Dan and Melissa on the engagement! 

 

 

listening to shugo tokumaru

Obama – Where Was I?

where were YOU?

A lot of people have claimed that the Election day of Barack Obama (whether you think he is the antichrist or the next MLKjr.) is one of those events that you will always remember where you were when it happened. Events such as a Limo getting into a car accident, some planes hitting a building… and now a black man becoming commander in chief. All tragedies in their own right, some would argue.

Myself? i can’t remember where I was when i heard about Diana’s car crash. I remember seeing it on TV and people talking about it, but i don’t think i really cared that much about someone dying in a car accident. Happens all the time!
The World Trade Center, now that i remember. i was listening to my clock radio tuned to none other than 104.9 XFM.
because it was cool.
my DAD listened to the Fox.
lets avoid the conversation that both radio stations essentially for 2 years were playing nothing but some sort of endless Nickleback, Creed and Theory of a Deadman Megamix. That was a dark time in the music world. Make no mistake.
So yes. XFM. Pepper and Crash? was that the morning show? I’m not gonna lie: Larry and Willie on the fox made pepper and crash sound like a bunch half-drunk frat boys somehow had broken into a radio broadcast booth and were attempting to tell every dirty joke they could before security caught them: Their morning show was garbage.

However this morning was different: Pepper was talking in a sullen, subdued voice… like he was talking about something that mattered to him. You would think he was explaining to his dad how that girl he was dating was actually still in high school; and yes, she was pregnant.
This was new. This was something to pay attention to! And so the soon-to-be-jobless 18 year old radio DJ’s were confronted with the difficult task of telling their listeners the news that America was under attack from what? they don’t know.

Thank you XFM. You reputable bastion of broadcast integrity, you hath informed me of tragedy.

Barack Obama.

snowboard premier: An event where hundreds of snowboarders (shredders) rent out and descend upon a movie theatre to watch the latest cinematic release of another crew of shredders (snowboarders). The movie is usually 30-45mins long and contains no content besides that of professional snowboarders professionally snowboarding. The music jumps between that of Gangster Rap, Techno Beats, and punk rock/heavy metal. Age of attendees is between 14-25. blood/alchohol levels also rise in direct correlation to age, as well as number of X’s on oversized t-shirt/hoody combo. Prizes are thrown into audience at end of movie, often by the same proffesional snowboarders featured in the movie itself.

Peter Line: Professional Snowboarder. The man is a dynasty. He is a founding member of Forum Snowboards and invented half of the tricks in snowboarding today. In the 90’s he was spinning cork before most people knew how to carve. For his part in “True Life” – (regarded as one of the greatest snowboard movies of all time) he was buttering into 7’s off tables, it would take another 5 years before people realized what buttering was. He rocked pink and rainbows on his board art before the gay/lesbian community had even copywrited the rainbow.

So prizes are being thrown into the crowd at random by the personelle onstage, things generally have degraded to the level of near-riot when the MC begins to drunkenly thank the sponsors: “like to thank Forum snowboards, Toyota, Foursquare…”

just then Peter Line grabs the mic from the sponsor and in a surprising act of political awareness, shouts;

“and thanks to America! for electing Barak Obamaaaaa”
- A great cheer erupts from the crowd of snowboarders, most of whom have no idea what Barak’s stance is on Foreign policy… or abortion… or anything for that matter. You might even argue that half of the people in attendance are under the impression that he is sponsored by the popular clothing company “obey”… Kinda like how Che Guevera is the lead singer of rage against the machine.

While many think no more of Obama than a trendy shirt that exponentially increases their game in bars and clubs… and regardless if very few actually know what his stance is on…anything: what matters is that for a moment, just a chronic-and-booze influenced moment, we were all unified in the glorious knowledge that somewhere. somehow. someone had just stuck it to someone. and they weren’t very happy about it all.

And thats how i found out that Obama was president.

listening to TV On The Radio.

Halloween

I’m at Ben’s house. it is a halloween party. The pumpkins are in the process of getting carved. I arrived late. Our stock of flammable/explosive devices is considerable. I arrive just as the mood of the party shifts to one of business.

There is something sacred in the tampering of screecharoos to make them into tiny sticks of dynamite:
it is ritual, it is culture. it is passed on from generation to generation, different geographical locations in North America have different methods. It is a right of passage.
We are in Ben’s shed. two are wrapping the screechers in tape, two are hammering. A single, dim incandescent light is all the illuminates the cobweb-filled shack. Tools hang from hooks on walls; our shadows dance across walls as the light swings precarious and flickers ominously. the *Crack *Crack *Crack of hammers echo around us like a jackhammer.
You wrap from the wick end first and spiral downwards, you apply a second piece of tape to the end, so the clay doesn’t come out. The more tape the better. The best tape is Duct. Second is Electrical. Third is packing tape. scotch rarely works. Some simply stomp the screecher with their foot: They have no respect for the craft. You hammer it flat, then flip it over and hammer the other side. hammer from wick side down to the end, then back up. Don’t hit with a glancing blow or you might tear the screecheroo open.
The men fall into an almost mechanical pace: tape is systematically wrapped and torn, wrapped and torn, wrapped and torn. screecher is passed to those hammering. passed to those hammering, passed to those hammering. Those hammering fall into a simultaneous pace, what was once discorded hammer falls of “tap-tap, tap-tap, tap-tap” becomes a single blow of “CRACK, CRACK, CRACK”
we are in Africa, beating our lumps of metal into machetes.
we are in Egypt, chiseling sandstone out of a quarry.
we are here, 800 years ago, smashing a rock into an arrowhead.
It is a breakneck pace, all must be finished; tunnel vision is experienced in the extreme. Some onlookers have never seen this before. They learn from watching; see what is done. If a male sees this ritual it is locked into his memory forever. At any given point at any time in his life in the future; if the situation calls for him to craft an explosive device from a consumer-grade firework: he will be able to.

Finally it is done. There are no more resources to consume. The tape has expired. The workers look up, blinking. as if emerging from a dark cave for the first time in years. The annual rites has been completed once again.

happy halloween.

Listening to FabricLive 41, mixed by simian mobile disco.

Fright Night: in quotation

“What it’s $25!”

“its 10:30 already… is it worth it?”

“i don’t care, all i want is a sweet, supple, creamy mini donut”

“guys lets think about this, is there anything else worth doing?”

“lets sneak in”

“dude we can’t climb over the fence, look at those spikes”

“alright fine lets pay”

“i’m cold”

“the lineups they say are an hour long!”

“too late, we’re here we’re going.”

………………………………………………………………………………..

“where are we going?”

“look lets just go on this one… Bates Motel, its supposed to be scary.”

“look how long the lineup is!”

“what else are we going to do?”

“its really cold”

“we’ve been standing in the line forever.”

“Clint its so easy to sneak through this lineup man”

“Dude we are in a group of 7, theres no way we are all sneaking in.”

“right…”

“man look at all those kids jumpin line, just wanna call’em out.”

“look at them go…”

“matt…”

“what?”

“that chick is checking you out.”

“no way bro…”

“dude for sure. – its because your wearing my snowboard jacket, you look ballin.”

“well i do admit i look ballin but i have no idea what you are talking about.”

“dude the blonde one, talkin with her friends.”

“hey your so ____’in hot.”

“matt.”

“what?”

“did you not just hear that.”

“what?”

“that chick just said you were hot.”

“WHAT!”

“i can’t believe you, she said it basically into your ear.”

“dude i have no idea what you are talking about.”

“look over my shoulder. the blonde one.”

“matt go talk to her.”

“no way!”

“she’s gonna wait for you in the haunted house.”

“Clint man don’t tell me these things!”

“well now you’ve totally given her the cold shoulder, way to go.”

………………………………………………………………………………..

“that was the most pathetic haunted house i’ve ever been in.”

“it wasn’t even scary!”

“dude look, its just two semi truck trailers stuck together. what did you expect?”

“alright well now what?”

“ummm.”

“dude i still can’t get over how utterly terrible that was, did we just pick the worst one?”

“hey lets do that music ride, you know; the spinny one.”

“yeah!”

“that ones sweet!”

“whoa hey look its Dallas.”

“Whats up man.”

“not much…”

“how long you been here?”

“an hour.”

“how many rides you go on?

“one”

“oh sucks… well we are goin on the music spinny-thing ride, see you around.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“i can’t believe they are closing the park. we’ve been on two rides.”

“definitely worth that $25…”

“well lets start heading out i guess…”

“I MUST have my mini donuts. this night will have been worth nothing unless i get them.”

“woah, easy clint.”

“hey look, lets go on the swing ride!”

“well, it IS the stereotypical PNE ride…”

“alright, its still open lets hit it up.”

“dude lets get kicked off, we have to.”

“alright… how.”

“umm, try and spin your seat, get the chains twisted so you spin around tons when it swings”

“yesss, great idea!”

“you guys are so stupid…”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

fin.

(never, ever go to fright night)